Last week on my 48th birthday I sat waiting for the sun to rise. I was listening to the waves crash onto the beach and there were tons of heavy clouds delaying the sunrise. Finally, a glimpse of the fire sun appeared sneaking through the clouds and then vanishing again. I started to think back to a year ago on my birthday when life was quite different.
I was in a dark place. My longtime partner unexpectedly broke up just a day before and I had zero interest in celebrating my birthday. I didn’t want to pretend I was happy and put on a smile. I didn’t want to answer the dreadful questions about the break up when I really had no answers myself. But I also knew that something had to give and us breaking up was necessary. We had been dating for 3+ years and we kind of lost the joy and excitement towards each-other.
Was it stress? Was it changing careers? Was it living at my mom’s? Was it him feeling the pressure of marriage, of being a father for Josi?
I took a lot of time by myself during the next four months to reflect on myself and what I brought to the situation. I knew I needed to focus on me and let Matt do his own work. It’s crazy how time and space can really open our eyes to things we didn’t see. We are back together now, a year later. We have moved cross-country to California. We both are working hard to build our new careers and honor each other.
So, just like the clouds that were covering the sun… some days are dark and lonely, and it may be hard to see the light. Believe that some hardships are meant to happen and the good will come. No matter what you are going through…be patient, give space, give time and the light will appear.